Unbeatable Ways To Boost Your Self-Confidence
Everyone is struggling with their self-image to some degree or another. No matter how it might appear on the outside, everybody is trying their best to be their best. And everybody fails from time to time, too. Working on your self-confidence is an important part of trying to construct a happy life for yourself. It is a sad truth that we often get in the way of ourselves, more than anyone else does. There is ultimately nothing stopping you from being who you want to be. All that holds you back is the ideas about yourself that you have. The good news? They are just ideas – they can be molded, or changed, to make more sense for you personally. If you are struggling with your self-confidence, then you are by no means alone. It is a constant battle for many people. So what are some of the things you can do, today, to feel better about yourself?
Focus On The Good
Most of the time, our poor perceptions of ourselves are the result of negative thinking. This, in turn, leads to more negative thinking, and so the cycle continues. So the trick, however simple it might sound, is to break the cycle. It doesn’t matter at what point in the chain you break it – so long as you do. And as long as you do it with a sense of finality and permanence. Key to your success here is to not expect immediate, rapid transformations. After all, that is not how life works. As long as you make the necessary changes, the desired results will occur. But don’t expect overnight miracles. Many people fall into this trap – and it only leads to more negativity surrounding their self-image.
Regardless of who you are or what your story is, there are some good factors to focus on. This can be guaranteed. There is nobody in history who is all bad. As a preliminary exercise, get out a notepad and pen. Spend a good half hour, and jot down everything about yourself that you are pleased with. This can be anything you like, ranging from appearance to achievements, or just general qualities. It doesn’t matter, so long as it is something you are genuinely pleased about – and as long as it is true. It also doesn’t matter how long or short your final list is. Whatever the results, keep it somewhere handy. Refer to it throughout the day, particularly when you are feeling low in self-esteem.
This is a simple exercise, but it is deceptively powerful. It is worth a go if you are struggling with low self-esteem.
Transform The Bad
Nobody is perfect, of course. And thank goodness for that! Perfection would be an incredibly boring way to be! If you are like anyone else, there are aspects of yourself which are somewhat less favorable. That’s good news, because it means that you are a complete person who can change over time. The trick with the less good stuff is to acknowledge it head on, without blowing it out of proportion. This is a fine balance to try and get right, but it is the only way that works.
It is only once you have really acknowledged something that you can work towards transforming it. And that is the good news here – everything can be transformed. There is nothing in life which is not workable. So the next step on your journey to more self-respect is to take small steps towards transforming the bad stuff, the stuff you don’t like.
Oftentimes, these are habits which we have picked up along the way, sometimes without even noticing. Whatever it is, draw up a plan for getting past it. Let’s take smoking as a common example. Being a smoker is bound to make you feel down about yourself. But there are active steps you can take to change it. Consider, first of all, switching to a less harmful alternative. An e-cigarette or a shisha pen might come in handy here. After that, you can work on gradually reducing your use, until eventually you feel no need for it anymore.
If you do achieve this, you will likely feel pretty good about yourself. Ultimately, this is how self-confidence builds. You carry out small actions which you didn’t think you were capable of. Gradually, you learn that you are bigger than you had assumed you were. And so, your confidence grows.
Take Praise & Criticism Lightly
Everyone likes to be acknowledged in their successful ventures. It feels nice to be patted on the back. Ultimately, however, you need to learn not to place too much emphasis on the opinions of others. Doing so reduces your own self-esteem. The confident adult is he or she who takes themselves at their own estimation first. This means accepting praise, without making too much of a fuss about it. Similarly, you need to accept that people will sometimes criticize you, but that this doesn’t really matter.
When you react strongly to either praise or criticism, you teach yourself that your self-worth lies ‘out there’. To really feel at home in yourself, teach yourself instead that it lies ‘in here’. This is the secret to building a solid base for your confidence to rest upon.
Remember: You Are Human
No matter how well or how poorly you carry out any of these tips, one thing remains the case. You are human. As such, you will occasionally fail. You will learn something, and then forget it again for a time. You will be at the hand of fate, and sometimes things won’t go your way. You might even act in a cruel manner, once or twice.
Remember: this is natural. Try your best to be your best, yes, but forgive yourself too. It is only in the act of self-forgiveness that a real patience begins to flourish. And in that patience comes a greater understanding of our relation to others and to the world at large. We are human, and that is more than enough already.